As the clock struck midnight, this overwhelming sense of gratitude came upon me (that sounded really churchy huh?😩). I immediately began to text my mother. I don’t speak on her much on my social media because I had my own feelings that I had to sort through and gain God’s eye of perspective on, but this post is dedicated to her. My mommy and Daddy, took my twin brother and I in. They were only looking for one child (a girl) but they were obedient to God so when they came across us in a book (yup, they picked us from a book) they chose to take us both instead of passing us up for what they actually desired.
My mom and I had a tough start from the beginning, I had already been forced to be a grown up and so imagine trying to parent a self taught, 8 year old girl, who has had to learn to survive in the #FosterCare system. It was tough. There were times when I would get so angry that I would black out and break everything in sight and fight ANYONE who came in my path, including my mother. Even through all of that, she didn’t give up. I left the home she built because I desired to find the people that I looked like, and she still didn’t give up. I had a baby, almost lost my life in a home invasion, tried to murder my child’s father, and she didn’t give up.
I post my life on my social media platforms, and I’m sure sometimes she reads them in total shock that I shared what I share, but she has NEVER contacted me and said one thing. Most times I get the “liked” notification from her.
I think that we as daughters sometimes set an unrealistic vision of how our mothers are supposed to love us. When it’s not done or it doesn’t feel the way we think it should, we get angry and we put them in a box, far away from our heart. We still love them, but only when we think people are watching.
My mom had a purpose in my life. She had no one to please but God. She loved me the way God told her to love me, because she knew her purpose. Stop getting angry when when folks don’t serve the purpose YOU created, it wasn’t for you to create. When my dad passed, I was at my moms house for about a month. One night God said, “now it’s time for you to serve your purpose in her life.” My mom leaned on and depended on me for the first time since I came to be apart of her family and I was and will forever be so humbled and honored. My purpose in my moms life began the day my dad took his last breath. As long as I have breath in my body, my mother will be just fine, because my Purpose WILL be fulfilled.